One important agent for building a happy and fulfilling relationship is affection and specific expressions that results in a feeling of closeness, passion and intimacy.
Some ways of expressing affection include quality time together, acts of service, physical touch and exchange of gifts but the easiest and one effective way is through pet names, the nick names you give to your lover.
There is something in a name. It represents a person and gives him or her a unique identity. Studies show pet name affects character and how lovers treat each other.
It promotes intimacy, passion and sense of belonging. It keeps relationships sweet, vibrant and alive. You must, therefore, desire to have a pet name for your lover.
How to choose a pet name Look closely at your relationship and the positive attributes of your lover. Think of how your lover makes you feel and form out an appropriate pet name for it.
For example, ‘baby’ shows innocence and care,’ sunshine’ shows the warmth you share, and ‘angel’ means you place your lover above all other people.
It is best to coin out names from common names such as ‘baby’ and ‘chocolate’. For example, a young woman thinks her lover treats her like an angel. She thinks of Angel Gabriel and calls her man ‘G’
Make the name unique and special, one you call truly yours and for your lover who is truly yours. Let it be a name you reserve for your lover alone.
Do not go for common names. Make up something totally different from what everyone else calls your lover. Make it personal and unique. It is also important to make sure your lover loves the name.
Avoid names such as ‘Kofi papa’ or Yaa mame’ because they distance you from your lover and reduce intimacy and passion. You must also avoid names such as ‘obolo’ ( obese) when you know your lover is concerned about her weight and is making frantic effort to control it.
Negative pet names are embossing and degrading since they induce ridicule and failure in the relationship
You must also appreciate that the dynamics of the relationship may change and your lover may show even more positive attributes. You can, therefore, give him or her a different pet name to show how he or she treats you.
A pet name for your lover? A pet name shows affection which, apart from building a healthy relationship, lowers your blood sugar level and reduces the risk of depression.
Pet names like all good words among others build friendship, calm anger, heal, give happiness and encouragement. They generate warmth and appreciation from your lover who in turn reacts more favorably to you.
You become a loving partner and you make your lover a loving partner too.
They are simple romantic ways to introduce your lover to others. They improve your communication because if you flavour your comments with pet names, your lover listens better. It is, therefore, healthy to have a pet name for your lover.
Fortunately, there are many common pet names to coin out yours; all mine, heartbeat, sunny, dear, sweet, love, precious, rose and star.
The many good times and happenings in your relationship are opportunities to coin out pet names for your lover. A pet name is a catalyst for a happy relationship.
Desire to have one that is truly yours and only for your lover. Let it be meaningful and personal to you.
• The writer is the Director of Eudoo Counselling Centre, West Legon. He is also the author of ‘Your Guide to Marriage, Love Unlimited and The Journey of Love’ (jydboakye.yahoo.com)
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